Mystery Movie Night

The last Sunday of every month is Mystery Movie Night for the boyfriend and his merry band of whacko pals. Each one hosts in rotation supplying the movies, food, and drinks. No one but the host knows what the movies will be. They are usually a double feature of horror films or some obscure art or sci-fi film.

Last night was our turn to play hosts. The choice of movies was left to me. I decided to screen 2 of the boyfriend’s movies. I could have chosen from any the ones he worked on as matte painter, 3D digital effects artist, miniature artist, etc. and shown something like The Chronicles of Riddick, Ed Wood, Titanic, or Looney Tunes: Back In Action. Instead I chose 2 films showcasing the boy’s acting skills.

The movie selection was Body Rock (1984) and Horror Brunch (1987). Body Rock may be the all time worst film ever made. It is amazingly bad from plot (what plot?), dialogue, costuming, music, to choreography. Yes boys and girls I said choreography, Body Rock is about white NYC break dancers and rappers (yes, I said white NYC break dancers and rappers) namely Chilly D (Lorenzo Lamas), and his pals like E-Z and Snake ... are you getting the picture? Chilly D vaults from dancing in the streets, tagging graffiti, and rapping to the top of the NYC club scene forgetting his street pals and his humble beginnings until he loses it all and returns to his roots. The costumer must have been channelling Emilio Pucci on acid. Body Rock was so bad it received 2 Razzie nominations in 1984; one for Worst Actor: Lorenzo Lamas and Worst Song: "Smooth Talker". Song: "Smooth Talker".
The boyfriend has a small bit part where he walks into the diner where his pal Chilly D is holding court and is told his name is on the guest list at the hot new club where Chilly is working.
Boyfriend: Hey Chilly!
Lorenzo Lamas: What’s happening?
Boyfriend: Get me into the club Friday night?
Lorenzo Lamas (rapping): I take care of my friends... I get them in for free ... you be on the list, under - Chilly D!
Boyfriend: Yeah!
Right, makes you want to throw up in your mouth a little ...




Horror Brunch is a short. It is a spoof of all the classic horror movies. The last shot of the film is an Alien creature popping out of the boyfriend’s chest.




In a salute to Body Rock’s NYC locale I had a buffet of deli cold cuts, salads, bagels, rolls, and celery tonic. Then in the media room I set out martini glasses next to individual miniature vodka and Pepto Bismal bottles as well as individual brown paper barf bags. All of this in addition to the obligatory popcorn and boxes of Dots, Junior Mints, Milk Duds, and Malted Milk Balls.

The evening was a huge success despite the look on the boyfriend’s face when I announced the movie selection ...

OK honey, next time you get to choose ...